SansYou

…while my back is against the crowd,

and when it comes down to it, I’m really not sure when I want to turn around.

I heard that I was an angry writer.
I’m not angry enough to provide rebuttal for [heresay],
so, [here,
say]
something that we all actually care about.

I repeat, I’m not angry,
but I’m definitely pretentious enough
to give some sort of respite.

He said
karma.
I say
hell,
we’re all headed to
something that’s only half of what we’re here for.

So why not call shotgun while the seat’s open?

I mean if I’m driving, baby, you know that I’m saving it just for you.
As long as you’ve got the alcohol to drown us both in this car to brain [hemorrages].
Or even if you don’t, I think a healthy car crash can help us get one of equal magnitude.

Or maybe you don’t ride because you hate the sight of me.
Shit, even
my dress’s [hem
rages] you because you know it was in yesterday’s paper.

But so was she; I guess you never let that stop you.

Alright, I know I can be a headache whore…

but she’s just a whore that can give you a headache…hemorrage, same difference.
Nahh headache hag.  That’s what she is.

Enough about her, I’m so tired of hearing
about it all through whispers
I wish I could see it
come out of your mouth
and hear your tongue say it.

Say that you’re dying.

Is it so wrong for me to wish that you were [miserable]…

[Me? Sir, able] yourself to come with me
to a place where even hell is just some
stupid [halation] around the
societal perception of what a snapshot of Hades’ dirty room looked like.

[Hey, elation], is all relative.
Can’t you see how FUCKING ecstatic I am?

Can’t you see that I wish you were just as FUCKING happy?

Fuck [brackets].

[Break it]. Break it like the bones around your ha-ha-heart.

Besides, I never thought it was aestheticly pleasing to have

white bones

red hearts

blue skin

pink eyes

and black letters

on white screens.

So I’ll save you from
reading this ugly thing any longer.

I’m tired of you
you who listen with mouths
and scream with ears
waiting to hear
about the next thing I fuck,
or fuck up.

I grow weary of you
you who acts ten feet tall
when you stand at a mere three
feet
and get up at a sad three
inches.

Since when was it
something to be proud of
when she claimed you were the only
only one
only one she could fit in her fucking whore mouth.
Fucking whore mouth. That’s what you do right?

Best stay in that alley anyways
since her pussy is as loose as
theatre curtains by the time the audience stands
for that encore.

But don’t expect it,
because they’re looking for
something more.

Not some dried-up pussy fest.

I applaud you
you who got away
with mailing black letters
and swinging salami,
like it was lunch time in Italy.

Fuck you.
ew, on second thought I take that back.

I’d have more fun fucking a hot dog,
because those taste better than salami anyways.

But who would catch the difference anyways?
When the amount of intellectuality that you carry
equivocates to the very meat that hangs between your scrawny ass legs.

We’ve got a sale folks
just make sure you get this old shit out of my face
before I puke.

I abhor you
you who I have no words for
yet also every word I can think of

I humor you
you whom I know every weakness
from pregnancy
to ell oh vee ee
to lost chess games
to lost futures.

I don’t care for you
I almost did, once,
but I figured I’ll be just remain content,
if you answered my single curiosity:

When is that bastard child due?

Because I’ll be the first in line
to throw that motherfucker out the window.

Don’t worry though, from the looks of that c-section
you have a lot more coming

Bitch.

theflashtoofast:

Love is such a powerful tool. Like the force. Or super powers. It can be used for good or twisted into something evil. Beings like myself rely on this emotion to fully give ourselves to other individuals on intimate levels. This is shown in different ways. Flowers, gifts, sexual interaction, among millions of methods. I take high value in the simplicity of life and refuse to take even the slightest detail for granted. A subtle I love you is all I want and need from my significant other, family, and close friends. The strength of those words has really become of high value to me these past few years and I wouldn’t use them without truly feeling love for whomever I say it to. Some people need more reassurance than that, and I can understand that. However, one should be cautious in questioning the forementioned feelings of another person. Melissa, I really do love you and all I ask of you is to truly believe me when I say it.

Kicking off my return to writing with this. Not anything poetic and certainly lacking of my aesthetic touches, but it says a lot…

 Glad to see you writing again loser. :]

“I’m cursed if you didn’t know. I am number 3. He was number 1. 13. But then…he was number 4. 43. 45. So then Roxanne was out. 36. Funny things happened before me. There was. 72. And then. 15. And way before that it was 7a, 7b, 7c, 7x, 7y, 7z. Finally. 73. Waiting for the cycle to kick in, is that bad? It’s all just some stupid constellation of numbers anyways.” —“Cantos:Homage to Modernist Insanity”

So, it all starts with number 1.

It’s funny how things turn out this way. But, I guess that’s always been your mentality, I mean, I did it to you and everyone else so that makes it ok for you to reciprocate the behavior.

As a part of my guilt, you know I’m going to stick around, and sadly, I’ll admit to it.

But, as a friend, and as the manifestation of all others who feel the same way, we are deeply offended.

You take us for granted.

Because we are your friends you expect us to be there when the storm blows over…

you forget that a friendship takes maintenance.

We are offended.

But since we are your friends, you are correct. We have no choice but to stay, and be here when you realize how wrong you’ve been.

Or, you may never realize, but who are we to have a say.

Know this. I will be here, whether it ends or not. That’s all I’ve been meaning to tell you throughout all the ignored phone calls and texts.

That being said, it’s fine that you choose her over me, I understand. I’m still offended, but I have done the same in the past so this is fair. Shit, we are all offended but no one else is man enough to say anything.

The only person with some balls is me, and you won’t give me the time of day.

Last night was my last attempt at trying to keep up whatever this is that we have.

I just want to say I’m tired. I’m tired of going 50, no, 75 and you not budging.
I’m tired of watching you look at me like I’m something expendable; something that you already have, not something that you have to keep up.
I’m tired of ranting to everyone about it and I’m tired of realizing I could never really get tired of it because that’s how frustrated I am.

I’m tired.

I’m tired of you.

Here’s my white flag. I give up. I’ll see you when it’s over.

If you wanted one just about you…

The number 20. I knew you’d be looking for it from the last post. This one is exclusive.

So here it is:

 Please don’t be like the others.

Please don’t let this cycle start over.

Because even though I don’t want it to…




20. I still feel like we’re not strong enough to fight it.

1. This is not in order, so don’t try to approach it that way because I am a dirty Commi here to bore you with excessive socialist banter.

11. “If I took all my clothes off and pooped in my bed, would you judge me?” Transition.

2. Take your face and flush it down the toilet. Eat it with deep-fried macadamia nuts. Transition/end.

5. I’m cursed if you didn’t know. I am number 3. He was number 1. 13. But then…he was number 4. 43. 45. So then Roxanne was out. 36. Funny things happened before me. There was. 72. And then. 15. And way before that it was 7a, 7b, 7c, 7x, 7y, 7z. Finally. 73. Waiting for the cycle to kick in, is that bad? It’s all just some stupid constellation of numbers anyways.

26. Stein’s Law of Identity: “Rose is a rose is a rose is a rose.” Therefore, don’t you wish you were one too?

12. What I said earlier is about you. Don’t try to deny it. you may have everyone fooled but even she verified it for me; you’re just some bitch wanting attention from a menu that is always happy to satisfy your feeding. Keep eating because we’re just the scale that likes to laugh while we tell you how much of a fatass you’ve become.

27. TransBlankition.

16. Stein’s incoherence: “Thank you for thinking for how do you do thank you Jane thank you too thank you for thinking thank you for thank you. Thank you for how do you.Thank you Jane thank you how do you do.” This is just a blog. Let it be that and nothing more.

7. This is more than a blog, it should be more than what it is; it is a kinetic force moving from dormant isolation. This is not just a blog. Let it be that and nothing less.

21. Yes I know there isn’t…well if you didn’t notice then I guess I won’t point it out. Transition.

15. Why are you reading reading this blog reading is appreciated blog reading blog blog this is not a blog blog this is not what you think everyday. This is not this is is a blog is not.

17. Hole transitioned puncher.

8. Pound’s vorticism: “The image is not an idea. It is a radiant node or cluster, it is what I can and perforce, call a VORTEX, from which. In decency one can only call it a VORTEX.” The denouncement of anything static applies here…

9. I know exactly who you are [positive]. But don’t [negative]. That’s ok [optimist], not [pessimist]. I don’t know that person [infantilism] that’s just some parallel beam of light that changes direction but stays parallel simultaneously in my eyes either [sophistication]. [Euphoric] [desperation] to know, because I really don’t want to know. [An assertion of infinite power and possibility] alongside [a mimicry of deep aimlessness and loss of bearings].

6. Toomer’s Constellation: “Enough for him to have to cut through ole Lemon’s canefield by way of the woods, that he might meet her. She was worth it….Sweet…the scent of boiling cane came to him.” We are all thrown in a random suspension of time at the mercy of many variables.

14. Dragons transitioning, demographics, roaming the world.

10. “How much do you want on your Gift Card?” Transition.

9. Clark’s Duality: “Modernism was always on the lookout for the moment, or practice to which both descriptions [negative and postive] apply.” Simple…not. Is. Tug of war.

24. Marred: Oil stains all these papers…literally. I guess this is supposed to be a transition?

3. This song is just a collage. Not. This blog is just a collage. It isn’t a collage. Some speechless collage that no one with understand.

19. Clark’s extremism: “[Modernism] cultivated extremism—it seems as an answer to modern life’s pragmatism and technicality (which of course most modernists also loved). Technique in modernism was not problem-solving. It made problems worse.” Problem:

22. Your attempts on that sad computer screen: words, forgotten in some book written by a preschooler. These four lines are all you’re worth.

13. Olson’s verification: “We must pick the fruits of the experiments of Cummings, Pound, Williams, each of whom as, after his way, already used the machine as a scoring to his composing, as a script to his vocalization.” You’re not as pretty as you think, even she agreed.

18. Do you like what you do? Maybe if you didn’t play so dumb, you wouldn’t be crying and apologizing about it later. Not that you really mean it all anyways.

23. Pound’s equal sign: “The apparition of these faces in the crowd: / Petals on a wet, black bough.” This is reorientation.

4. #musicmonday: “And I’ll never love again / Oh boy you’ve left me speechless / You’ve left me speechless, so speechless / I can’t believe how you slurred at me / With your half wired broken jaw / You popped my heart seams / On my bubble dreams, bubble dreams.”

25. Eat that up while you cake your fake ass face on bitch, because I’m tired of hearing your voice. So is he. Ask him and you’ll see what I mean.

28. Negation: This is not a count-up.

kevfbrownn:

My tumblarity tumbled all the way down to 2

 The fuhhh, Mine’s all the way down to 7?!

theflashtoofast:

Friday Friday Friday…

• Uber Yardwork in the rain. Awesome.
• However, immediately after that, I think I was hit by super hay fever. Felt like shit all day.
• Picked up some water for mom with the bro.
• Caught Patrick doing something rather hilarious :) HAHAHAHA
• Went to the westside and chilled with the Paxon crew and friends at Karen’s
• Watched Kevin fall asleep like 100 times today.
• Contemplation

All in all, a simple day. Car washing tomorrow!

 Omg, was he jacking off?

I’ve got birds in my ears and a devil on my shoulder and I phone to the other but I can’t get a hold of her…what’s a crush to do?

One of my all time Cute Is What We Aim For favorites.

Kevfbrownn

I <3 ATL

Gesture drawing of my sister.